Topics roasted include: director Kevin Smith's new film Jersey Girl Howard Stern fined and Oprah wasn't: for similar verbal gaffe Richard Simmons: slap-happy at the airport the novel Da Vinci Code is still on the best-seller list actor/singer Jada Pinkett Smith opens for Britney Spears in Europe Tom Hanks' new film The Ladykillers Democratic presidential candidate X-treme John Kerry the Brat Back is back, twenty years later, and on television Paris Hilton and Britney Spears almost get hurt off-beat action figures of Donald Rumsfeld, and others, are the rage and more.

Upgrade and downgrade: artist crossovers.

Who had the best week ever: Beyoncé Knowles. Jacqui Malouf said it well, ""This woman is unstoppable.""

Closing video: ""Naughty Girl,"" by Beyoncé Knowles.