1. Sonny and Cher open the show with ""Got To Get You Into My Life"" and banter about Sonny's dream of being the President Of the United States.
2. ""The Vamps"" -- Swimming queen Esther Williams (Cher) falls hook, line and sinker for a fisherman (Sonny), an act that doesn't particularly impress her underwater father, King Neptune (Don); Sandra, the fictitious woman from Shangri-La (Cher), informs her father (Sonny) that she would like to share the secret of eternal life with Ronald Colman (Don); and Superman (Sonny), Batman (Don) and Wonder Woman (Cher) enter the same public phone booth to change into their super hero outfits and rescue a stranger on the street (regular Ted Zeigler) who's being attacked by a wild gorilla.
3. ""Headlines In the Papers"" -- Don joins the show's regulars for a montage of skits and one-liners based on current events and people in the news, such as the Vietnam War, inflation, female jockeys and the prison system's new conjugal visits.
4. Sonny and Cher perform ""