-Chicken Cannon News: Chicken Cannon News reports on Saddam Hussein re-election, TD bank CEO, Ontario government's fund for developmentally challenged groups, Chretien announces Canada war strategy, Jimmy Carter, French tanker gets bombed, Steven Spielberg, Prince Harry, Dr. Scholl's Toothpaste, Museum of Sex, Dr. Seuss theft and new bikini law.

-Wilson & MacAulay: Solicitor General Lawrence MacAulay tackles his troubles, one scandal at a time.

-Pizza Couple: Why frozen pizza tastes like takeout.

-Saddam's Mistress: Saddam Hussein's mistress kisses and tells all, and has the mole to prove it.

-Java Gab - Cable Bills: Java Joe gets his decaf low-fat mochaccino in a knot over his cable bill.

-The Chrétien & The Copps: Jean Chretien and Sheila Copps plan the PM's legacy.

-The New B.S.: Hip news anchors walk and talk, and stumble through the news. Topics covered – Queen's Jubilee, new Oxford dictionary words, NHL safety nets, British motorists, Popes chastity speech, Arnold S